The Anxiety Series: The Lost Courage

A COURAGE LOST

Anxiety has many triggers... a shattered relationship... a mistake... a victim of a crime... a broken heart... a surfacing fear... age... experience... being falsely accused... The realization that we cannot control the world around us is never thought of as we enjoy our roaring twenties... but the "glamour" 30's... and the years after, the ticking of the death clock rings louder and louder...

We look back on all the stupid things we did... and survived... and kiss the pavement for God's grace... Death, after all, is in His hands... so why do we worry about tomorrow?

FROM DISCOVERY TO RECOVERY

It sounds easy enough... yet we cling so tightly, to what we can control... My "giant" to overcome is a plane... a simple plane... which I have flown, many times, over the years... and yet one day... the panic surfaced... The rough weather and my fellow passenger (a Palestinian doctor) who neglected orders by the pilot to stay seated... im sure, greatly influenced this emerging fear... but the reality of the power of anxiety... burst into my vision in one, 1-hour flight... so heavily...

What I had dismissed in so many others with phrases of "Give it to the Lord" and "let go and let God" were pills almost impossible for me to swallow... My lack of empathy towards those who struggled with issues of the mind, mocked my once-fearless heart... and pierced it with echoing laughter...

FROM THE PASTURE TO A PALACE

In the book of 1 Samuel, David the "giant slayer" became a fixture in King Saul's palace. He was a hero across the land and the "polls" indicated that David was gaining more popularity than the king. This enraged the king and he demanded for the death of David. David had to run to the isolated hillside and hide from the king and his army.

David's star power had climbed and crashed in a matter of weeks. His bed had once moved from a pasture to a palace. He now found himself back in the pasture. The darkness of night must have kept David from a peaceful night's sleep. He was a wanted man whose only fault was to slay a giant. How could this brave warrior find himself now cowering behind rocks?

Easy. Some of the most powerful minds, greatest kings, and legendary icons struggled with anxiety and similar conditions. Edvard Monch painted "The Scream" depicting an episode of extreme anxiety.

From Silence to Signals

Never be afraid to call on someone when you are hurting. Not all battles are meant to fight alone. Hand in hand, you can face your giants... one stone at a time.........

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Failure is a Gift

I sat in the room, nervous. I had sensed this moment coming all week. Though I felt a small comfort and peace, deep inside, I was terrified. I was bracing for the letdown—far from my first. I made small talk with someone twenty years my junior, knowing that soon, he would ask me to step down. That reality was hard to face. My mind drifted back to my first year as a deputy. I had called my father repeatedly, distressed over my fifth write-up. Each time, he told me to thank them for the discipline, not to quit, and to keep my head up. But I was overcome with sorrow. I felt like a failure. Maybe I could earn straight A’s, but I had no common sense. I feared I would never catch on. I was beginning to give up. Still, my dad insisted I keep going. In my first week alone, I had discharged my weapon—firing over sixteen rounds at a bull on Super Bowl Sunday. Not long after, I found myself in a full-blown foot pursuit of an escapee, my face, mostly pride battered from the struggle. My track...

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I Am NOT Just a Number

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