What Gods Taught Me in the Mountains

So I came to the mountains once again...the Adirondacks... Ive found myself here my entire life... growing up... summers.. one Christmas... my college years... a cuple years by myself visiting my grandparents.. and the past couple years with my family... to the town called "Hope".. its a small town... of less than 1,000 people.. surrounded by mountains, rivers, streams, lakes, and woods... words cannot describe its beauty...

Rarely have I come to this place to learn.. but to enjoy... and relax... float down the river.. fish.. kayak... but this year.. something was missing... peace... the burdens of stress I have been carrying this past year... were to large for me... Sometimes in life, we let the "little things" devastate our "journey"... I had to learn to let some things slip away... I needed to "catch" and release...

I sat on a rock today surrounded by water... looking for a smallmouth bass to catch... and I asked God "why do You have me here?"... Why have you always brought me to this place? I finally told God that I was ready to "hear".. and I was...

Most of this trip, I have been a saturated with worry... about the babies and the roadway, dogs, my families safety, being away from the job, things people say to me.. my perception to others, etc... I had failed to "be still"... even at a waterfall, my worries strangled the beauty of it... And here in the town of Hope... I search for peace...

Psalm 5:8 "I will both lie down and sleep in peace,for You alone, LORD, make me live in safety." Safety and security are two things that worry me the most. Those are things I cannot control. I have to rely on Someone so much greater than myself for these things... And being still? I am never still.. I am always "on the run", looking over my shoulder, and failing to catch the "wonder of it all".

Ive learned so much being with my family for two weeks... im usually very independant... and very "in control" of my day to day plans.. decisions and whatnots... This has not been the case.. and I did not adjust well... Good to know... something to work on... letting off the controls.. and handing them over to someone else is being meek... which is not always a "weak" or bad thing.. my attitude was terrible most of the time.. sometimes reasonably.. but I do not handle orders as well as I should... pride shows its ugly head...

You think you are growing and doing well.. and then ur tossed out of ur comfort zone... and the lessons you learn.. if ur looking.. are immeasurable... its painful... but so worth it... Putting others first... Biting my tongue.. NOt demanding my rights... is sometimes the best way to find peace.. within yourself... Hopefully, I can bring these lessons on the "road".. home with me... God is gracious.. I am not being hard on myself... just a realist... with open eyes.. and open heart... and a love for a Savior... who loves me... despite me...