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Damage Control

How do we handle being told we are wrong... Does a volcano erupt in our soul and our mouth spew defensive lava on all those who brave the "climb".... There really is an excuse we can give for almost anything... but like everything else... excuses get old....

Today my challenge would face me as I ended my day... a "confrontation" of sorts... i was told I was insensitive... and the excuses surfaced quickly... calming the blast of news that I had unintentionally hurt someone I cared for...Being a "fast talker" cut me some time.. but even the words I spoke were clearly defined as shallow no matter how I decorated them... i had already blown my presentation..

I jogged.... i prayed... but now my heart was as sad as the person I had hurt prior in the day... a year ago... my rebellion would have kicked in and succeeded... i would have told myself that people are to sensitive... and noone is going to make me feel bad... but God has a hold of my heart.. and his whispers entered the darkest corners of my heart... I needed forgiveness.... so I turned to Psalm 51... this is the chapter all about asking forgiveness.. I have read this chapter and prayed it more than a dozen times...

"blot out my rebellion...wash away my guilt.. and cleanse me from my sin (vs 1-2) For I am conscious of my rebellion and my sin is always before me" (vs3).. see im not "too good" to know that I am a sinner... step 1 for those addicted to sin...

"So you are right when you pass sentence, you are blameless when you judge" (vs4) "surely you desire integrity in the inner self, and You teach wisdom deep within". "purify me with hyssop and I will be clean, wash me, and I will be whiter than snow" (vs 6-7).. "let the bones You have crushed rejoice"...

Create in me a clean heart and renew a steadfast spirit within me (vs 10)

Sometimes I must bite my tongue... stop excusing my harshness... because of my "line of work" and own the fact that I fail... I stomp on the gentle... and bully the broken...

To ever be forgiven, you must forgive yourself.. this can only be done... when you ask a Savior for mercy.................

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