I Am NOT Just a Number

A question was posed "what don't you feel free to bring up with me?". What is my effect on you? Are you approachable with conflict? Are you the type to never speak up for fear of saying the wrong thing? Or are you the type to dominate a conversation without taking the time to listen to another view? In a recent Biggest Loser episode, two new players worked hard from home to enter the competition almost 5 weeks into the season. The new players were sized up immediately and anything could have happened. One of the new players, Adrian, entered the competition and began talking about how easier the workouts were on the ranch than the ones he had done solo at home. He failed to listen to his teammates when told that his "prideful statements" were hurting them. His pompous attitude was a turn-off and within two weeks he was sent right back home. What was Adrian's effect on the team? It was saturated with anger, chaos, division, fighting, and loss. That is why dai...

Many people over the past several weeks have commented on the "inspiration" or encouragement that I try to share on the Facebook platform.. and while most things I post are actually things I hear or read that are a super encouragement to me.. I look back even several years ago at "where I was" and think about how many people, right now.. feel how I did then.. lets take a look.. "The Black Sheep" The fighting struggle in my head… Its where im at Its… am i dead? And i feel raindrops sting my soul And i cry out “I hate my role!” Who is it here that haunts my dreams? I wish to sing But i hear screams… And why cant i deny the cries of blood thats spilt.. of demon’s lies. A light is shone through mystic trails I’m all alone Yet i hear wails.. The spirits laugh, they spit, they jeer I cry to stop But no one hears. I am a lamb to slaughter’s lair i bleat, i bleed.. But no one cares... This was written 5 years ago.. when I felt like a "black sheep"... and...

"The euphoric feelings of being in love have an average life span of two years" according to Dr. Gary Chapman in his book "Happily Ever After". Then the reality hits and the differences and conflicts between a couple are more than self-evident. What happens once these ugly conflicts surface, falls into two categories: the parties decide to negotiate amicably or decide their incompatibable and walk away. Dr. Gary Chapman, author of the Five Love Languages, believes that many times couples are not looking for resolutions but refuse to leave the arguing mode. "Unresolved conflicts become barriers to harmony.' 'Life becomes a battlefield and couples become enemies'. 'By means of verbal bombshells, they fight the same battles over and over again, inflicting injuries that push them even farther apart emotionally'". As one husband stated about unresolved conflicts "it's the difference between heaven and hell". Dr. Chapman asks th...

Driving to work the other day, I heard an interview with Timothy Keller in which he stated that the "jittery or euphoric feeling" a couple have when they first meet is not necessarily love. He advised that what many believe is love, is actually self-ego, and the person your falling for is actually the person that is filling your ego. That is why the infatuation is so intense because you have found someone who is boosting your self esteem, telling you what you want to hear, and making you feel as if you are the absolute greatest. Later on in life, once they move past the 2-7 years mark, the love they were really looking for kicks into full throttle because the couple overcame the hurdles. Very interesting. And as we have all learned.. feelings can lead us to severe heartaches... Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a book called "Happily Ever After". In the book he uses seasons to describe marriage or dating. When you first begin to date, you are in the spring season. Unfortunatel...